Can't even come up with a pithy subject line for this one.‏

(A colleague walks past me really early in the shift.)
Colleague: “UIM.”
(UIM takes off his headphones.)
Colleague: “There’s some chocolate cake in the kitchen. You can have some for breakfast.”
(Sad pause.)
UIM: “Man, I’m not actually comfortable quoting Cosby routines now. It’s like I wasted my entire childhood listening to the same 8 albums.”