Drunk Thoughts

 It's really weird how comfortable it feels to be drunk, even while you feel things careering wildly out of control.

There's some part of being drunk that feels comfortable, in the way that a heavy blanket, or a stack of blankets, feels comfortable in the cold, while at the same time, you feel uncomfortable because you have to take extra care to express yourself, or to move when you get out of your chair,

Drunk Cuisine Experiment #1

 No, you cannot force a Red Vine through a Stuffed Puffs Chocolate-on-Chocolate marshmallow as though the Red Vine were a  stick for roasting the marshmallow.

Singing to myself while drunk on the toilet

"Urination - all I ever wanted.

Urination - had to get away.

Urination -meant to be spent alone,"

- You know, if Belinda Carlisle and Jane Wiedlin decide to kick my ass for this, that's fair.