#Repressed Anger #ThisDidn'tActuallyHappen

Today's bad idea: answering all work questions with Duran Duran lyrics.
This was triggered by the lyric "I'm on a ride and I want to get off / But they won't slow down the roundabout."

If I knew more people in the office, they might ask why I was there, and I'd claim "Watching over Lucky clover.  Isn't that bizarre?"

But, my team shifted office space during the plague, so no one there would know me well enough to shrug it off with "Who really gives a damn about a flaky bandit?"

Truths and useful phrases from a previous boss.

"Thank you for your two cents, but I'm afraid you've got change coming back."

"Go sell that crazy somewhere else."

"If the high point is the tree catching on fire, then I just won't bother with Christmas."

"Yeah, that's it - we smoked the pooch right there."


"I don't want anyone horizontal on those couches.  When people go horizontal, stuff starts coming out of them."

#RepressedAnger

"Have you outsourced the data correction to particularly slow and decrepit mules?"

#RepressedAnger

"Are there any other similar enhancements to the datafeed which you've been planning, such as catapults full of pigeon guano aimed at our homes?"

#RepressedAnger

"There are not enough animated-gifs-of-Darth-Vader-force-choking-an-incompetent on the entire internet to express how enraging this is."

#RepressedAnger, #RepressedSarcasm, #INeedToStayEmployed

Developer: "I can undo the code with the memory leak, but that would add back the deadlock problem."
Boss: "I do not endorse adding back deadlocks."
UIM: (thinks) "Can we also make sure we stop adding Grimlocks?"